Remembering Liz Armbruster

Yesterday, my friend Liz Armbruster died. Her passing was sudden and unexpected. She was just 51. Wife, mother, grandmother, Liz was a frequent commenter on this site and the proprietor of her own wonderfully-written blog, In Search of the Empty Nest. We will miss her deeply and personally. In tribute to Liz, I've revised a poem I posted in June upon the deaths of Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson and Billy Mays. I trust that Billy won't mind if I now call upon Liz to represent the mortality of us all.


Send not to know for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee. ~ John Donne


First the bell tolled for the King of Sidekicks,
and it tolled for a perfect pace,

And then the bell tolled for a TV Angel,
and it tolled for a heavenly face,

And then the bell tolled for the King of Pop,
and it tolled for an elegant grace,

And now the bell tolls for the humble blogger,
and it tolls for the human race.

~ Robert Brault

Thoughts of an Armchair Activist and More

First, from our armchair activist...

"Man, in his sensitivity, does not give names to animals he intends to eat but goes on giving names to children he intends to send to war."


"No doubt more of those who are without sin would cast the first stone if they didn't tend to have paws."


"There is a limit to man's carnivorousness. As a rule, he does not eat meat that started out having hands."


"A true sportsman is a hunter lost in the woods and out of ammo."



... and something from our resident ruminator...

"In this, the late afternoon of my life, I wonder: am I casting a longer shadow or is my shadow casting a shorter me?"


"Sometimes our prayers for success are answered by an apparent failure, a change of course being necessary for success."


"Just once it might be instructive to pretend you're accepting an award for failure, just to see who you would thank."



... and a few from a clearly tiring brain...

"I've discovered that you can't open a clear plastic food container with your teeth, and I'm beginning to think the dinosaurs couldn't either."


"Perhaps the Ten Commandments would be more widely observed if Moses had brought them down on refrigerator magnets."


"A wise saying is something you keep picking up off the floor in front of your fridge."


"Question: If time paused, how would we know the length of the pause?"


"Okay, so you want to be a college teacher. Figure twelve years for elementary, middle and high school, four years for college, two for a Master's degree, three or so for a PHD -- then you'll be needing your Brains-You Were-Born-With Equivalency Certificate... ."


"Think about it, have you ever seen a high school diploma on a doctor's wall?"


"Hail the academic study group! Think of all we owe to the work of Ike Newton's crew and the ideas of Al Einstein and his team."



... and, finally, two from the archives

"Judge kindly the person whose shadow you have never cast."

"A true friend stands in your shadow and thinks it shade."


~ Robert Brault

Taking Advantage of Michaelmas Day

Tomorrow, September 29, is Michaelmas Day. There's still time to send a greeting to a friend or relative -- and there's always a good excuse to do so. Here's a few possibilities.

To a Friend:

Here's wishing you a Michaelmas
That's cheerful, warm and homy
And filled, dear friend, with mem'ries of
The fifty bucks you owe me.


To a Neighbor:

Dear neighbor, just a word to say,
Wish you well this Michael's Day,
Wish you joy in everything,
Wish return of following:

-- one weed trimmer
-- one pair garden shears
....


To a Sister:

A cheery card to darling Sis
To wish you Happy Michaelmas,
And since we're chatting anyway --
I've had Mom since Labor Day!



Bonus Thought:

If I had my life to live over again, I think that this time I'd let Mom live it entirely.


~ Robert Brault

Thoughts on Education and Understanding

The word "education" comes from the word "educe," which means to "draw out." So much of teaching is the opposite, a "pounding in" of facts, rules and methods. But there are moments magical to a teacher, moments of true "education," when the teacher engages a child's cognition -- and finds recognition.


"There is a who, what, when and where that comprises the usual history lesson. There is a how and why that comprises the lesson of history. To impart knowledge of the first, the teacher instructs. To elicit understanding of the second, the teacher educates."


"The average teacher explains complexity; the gifted teacher reveals simplicity."


"In many areas of understanding, none so much as in our understanding of God, we bump up against a simplicity so profound that we must assign complexities to it to comprehend it at all. It is mindful of how we paste decals to a sliding glass door to keep from bumping our nose against it. "


"Children do not instruct their parents, but they educate their parents wonderfully."


"Though it invariably meets the requirements of the school board, education is not the extension of ignorance to every subject in the approved curriculum."


"There is nothing instructive in a wise saying. It does not impart to you a skill; it does not provide you information. It is education in the purest sense -- a drawing out of what has been latent in your understanding. Your pleasure in the saying does not come from having learned something but from having something you knew elucidated and confirmed. What we call wisdom is the expression of what we already know in our hearts."



Odds and Ends

"Life is short, God's way of encouraging a bit of focus."


"There is nothing more ineffective than a political party that can't get its lie together."


"If it is not a theory or a practice, it is likely a code of ethics."


"I can't be a complete fool, because that would mean I completed something I started."


"We would not so much believe that fate rules our lives if we had witnessed our parents' bumbling first date."


~ Robert Brault

Thoughts Mostly on Family and Light Bulbs

"A family toast is the cheerier the more plastic cups."


"You notice, raising a young family, that every day seems to finish up better than it started."


"In a houseful of toddlers and pets, you can start out having a bad day, but you keep getting detoured."


As Mom used to say, "Never be bothered by something you'd be splitting your sides over if it were happening to Lucille Ball."


There are times when, seeing the whole family gathered together at the dinner table, you think,"My God, if this is the whole family, who's been in charge all this time?"


"As to spats with your in-laws, they'd be easier to make up if it weren't for the kissing."


"What with these energy-efficient light bulbs, it now takes a cartoonist four panels to show someone getting a bright idea."


"Whaddya know, all those years they were calling you a dim bulb, they meant you were efficient."


"Either way, things are a lot better -- either a lot better than they were or a lot better than they're going to be. "


"As a gardener, I'm among those who believe that much of the evidence of God's existence has been planted."


"Even the illustrious are laid to rest in such a way as to make the mowing easier."


"Every twenty-four hours Mother Nature looks around and decides to redew."


Heard from the son of a single mom: "The best friend I ever had wasn't trying to be my friend. She was trying to be my dad."


A final thought on family:
"There are days when the family flies off in all directions in the morning, only to reassemble around the dinner table in the evening. A word of advice -- commit those days to memory."


~ Robert Brault

More Thoughts Wise and Otherwise

Occasionally ask yourself this question: "If I were to stop fooling myself, what would I do at this moment?"


"The thing about a social slight is this -- that it has no existence unless you let yourself feel slighted."


"If you can't forgive and forget, pick one."


"There is no daily chore so trivial that it cannot be made important by skipping it two days running."


"A child quickly figures out that no matter how many reasons adults give for doing something, they do it for the real reason."


"Never look back, unless it's to toss someone a tow rope."


"Decisiveness is the art of minimizing the number of reasons you require to act for the obvious reason."


"The explanation is always longer when there isn't any."


"Be wary of the man who explains his reason by giving another reason."


The first rule of politics is "Never explain and do so at length."


"Once a man has won a woman's love, the love is his forever. He can only lose the woman."


One thing you really want to hold onto in this life is the capacity to be appalled.


Looking back, you realize that there are just three things needed in life -- faith, family and an occasional quiet ...

a. cup of tea
b. glass of wine
c. stroll in the woods
d. walk by the sea
e. (your choice)


~ Robert Brault

Spoofs on the Contemporary Scene

Billboards Seen Along the Morning Commute


"Three Miles to JERRY'S SMELL-THE-ROSES DRIVE-THRU"


"CONTEMPLATIVE RELIGIOUS RETREATS - Free Internet"


"Attention Working mothers. Turn Your Quality Time Into Cash! "


"Busy execs, Enjoy a Leisurely Vacation in Half the Time!"


"ROAD LESS TRAVELED BY GETAWAYS. Twice-a-day flights from all major hubs."




Religious Best Sellers

The St. Francis of Assisi Guide to TV Ministries
Twelve vows of poverty suitable for TV evangelists. Methods of distributing funds to needy viewers. Includes boilerplate apology for promiscuous personal behavior.

A Coach's New Testament
Ten parables of Christ clarified by football analogies. Actual plays diagrammed. Forward by Pete Carroll.

Perfecting God
An evangelical scholar outlines five ways in which God might perfect Himself through fuller acceptance of the teachings of Christ.

When Golf Happens to Good People
Rabbi Kimmelman explains how golf can exist in a world created by a loving God.



Bonus Thoughts

"If you spend all your working days being someone else's messenger, blame the messenger."


"Okay, I'm old. How old? Old enough to remember when Sunday drivers weren't going anywhere."


"Never say never, and never, ever, say never ever."


I almost can't bear the look in a dog's eyes that says, "I would gladly be your soulmate if I only had a soul."


"Oh, what I would give to relive my life with a one-minute delay."


~ Robert Brault

Thoughts: Some Heavy, Some Light

Some heavy...

"Some day, in paradise, man will consult with the better angels of his nature. For now, in this world, he works with his lesser demons."


"You do not wake up one morning a bad person. It happens by a thousand tiny surrenders of self-respect to self-interest."


"There is this about a self-evident truth -- that it can never be proved, because any proof offered will be less self-evident than the premise. All attempts to prove it will appear to fail, and in failing, they will cast doubt upon the premise. Such is the case with the existence of God. It is a self-evident truth obscured by dubious proofs."


"I live in a world where events have no cause and phenomena no origin. I reject the self-evident because it cannot be proved by the suspect. I acknowledge that I know nothing, yet reject all that I do not know. I am a skeptic. Welcome, Alice, to my strange land."


"Only among principled parties can there be compromise, and, of necessity, it must appear to be a compromise of principle. In fact, it is a discovery of principle, accomplished by leaving on the table prejudices and self-interests that only posed as principles. In the end, each party leaves the table more truly principled for the compromise."


In a dark moment I ask, "How can anyone bring a child into this world?" And the answer rings clear, "Because there is no other world, and because the child has no other way into it."


"At 70, I have no concern about being a shadow of my former self. It is enough that my current self has a shadow."



... and some light


"In a household of toddlers and pets, we discover this rule of thumb about happy families -- that they are least two-thirds incontinent."


"In the time it takes you to understand a 14-year-old, he turns 15."


"Life is short, especially when you consider that one-third of it is based on circumstantial evidence."


Every generation of teenagers builds its own totally unique vocabulary around the word "cool."


"I've concluded, after observation, that my Lab does not actually think, which is not to say she doesn't have an opinion."


"Exile a man to a desert island, allowing him only his dog, and in time his self-image will conform to his dog's opinion of him. This explains why Napoleon came back for one more shot at emperor."


Beethoven composed symphonies after going deaf. Monet painted masterpieces after going blind. A pessimist hears this and thinks, "With my luck, I'll never go deaf or blind."


Are you a positive or negative thinker? To find out, complete this thought.

"Alexandros of Antioch took a block of marble and chiseled away from it everything that was not his masterpiece, the Venus de Milo. If you will chisel away one fault from your character every day, you may discover --

a) that you're actually a statue of Margaret Thatcher.
b) that you're still just a block of marble.
c) that there are pigeon droppings on your shoes.
d) that you, too, are a hidden masterpiece.


~ Robert Brault