The following twelve thoughts are not mine. They're by a fellow aphorist named John Alejandro King, also known as The Covert Comic. I'll tell you more about him after you've enjoyed this small sampling of his wit.
"I'm not afraid to think the unthinkable. I just can't figure out a way to do it."
My mother taught me: 'Always remember to wash between your ears."
"I would like to change the world, but I can't find a diaper big enough."
"They say you should never raise your hand to your children, but how else am I supposed to request their permission to speak?"
"Money isn't everything. There also has to be stuff to buy."
"Instead of building a better mousetrap, why not just genetically engineer an inferior mouse?"
"Know thyself, but officially disavow the relationship."
"If brevity is the soul of wit, how come it has more syllables?"
"After my accident, the doctors told me I shouldn't be alive. It wasn't a medical opinion - they were expressing a deeply held personal belief."
"There is untold wealth in Africa -- and untold Africa in wealth."
"Live each day as if it were your last. Lie in bed with a bunch of plastic tubes stuck in your body."
"The state of confusion has more than two senators."
~~ John Alejandro King
JAK sent me a fan letter the other day, and so I spent a little time checking him out. What I found left me open-mouthed. Here is an inventive, comic talent that puts my own forays into offbeat humor to shame. Jack Handy, move over -- your successor has arrived. I should emphasize that the items above are only twelve of the hundreds of John's items you can find on the quote site thinkersandjokers.com. That is where to start, since it showcases John's best. After that, you can check out John's own site at covertcomic.com I should caution that John is always irreverent and sometimes a bit off-color, so steel up your sensitivities. A genius must be cut a little slack. Why the handle, The Covert Comic? Because John is a full-time CIA officer, or so he claims. Enjoy!
rb
17 comments:
Ah, you found your kindred quotemate! On many of them I said, "This sounds just like something Robert would say."
My favorite:
"Live each day as if it were your last. Lie in bed with a bunch of plastic tubes stuck in your body."
And the one that sounds most like something Robert would say:
"The state of confusion has more than two senators."
Thanks for sharing, Robert.
Randi,
Hi. I appreciate the comparison, but the reason I'm touting JAK is that he's said dozens of funny, ingenious things that I could never have thought of. Readers who click on the links above will soon enough discover what I mean.
smiles,
rb
Good Morning rb, I've enjoyed reading the above thoughts you shared from John and bookmarked his site to explore later. Hope you are well,It's a beautiful day here in Pennsylvania!
Ariana
I keep coming back for more. Now, I'll be coming more back for more and more and more! What a great talent you discovered. Thanks for sharing yours and his! ~donkimrey
You're right. The guy is GOOD. I'm going to check out his site.
=)
Ariana,
Greetings, dear friend, it's been a while. Our beautiful day in Connecticut has turned gray, hopefully not due to global graying.
Don,
I think John has a "Contact Me" button on his site, if you want to drop him a "Well done." I'd be curious to see if he can shake off positive feedback as stubbornly as I can. (smile)
Sue,
If you're reading this, John -- when Sue says you're GOOD, you're GOOOOOOODDD!!!
cheers all,
rb
Robert, I agree with Randi above. John and you are definitely kindred spirits! There's always room for intelligent, funny, insightful, hilarius thoughts and quotes! Thanks for sharing.
Becky,
And now, besides John and me, you have Mark Twain out with his new knee-slapper, "Buried Alive in Elmira."
smiles,
rb
"I would like to change the world, but I can't find a diaper big enough." Grateful for wonderful insights, pointers and the gentle touch all through Robert
Raj,
Thanks, but please direct your appreciation to John, not me.
smiles,
rb
His sharp wit is every bit as original as your own observations. Thanks Robert...they put a smile on my face.
Ken,
The difference is, with John it's wit, with me it's observation.
smiles,
rb
I've fallen in love with myself by reading your work!
Nick,
Now there's a cryptic comment, but thanks, I guess -- and a reminder that it's JAK's work.
smiles,
rb
good post... fine tune and wits... it seems mr john thinks in the way u think...take care not to collide....
I'm not afraid to think the unthinkable. I just can't figure out a way to do it."
My mother taught me: 'Always remember to wash between your ears." love these....
salu,
Thanks. There are hundreds more like this from John. Do check out the links, above.
smiles,
rb
I don't know where I saw this. I might've made it up, but I don't think so. Every driver should have a dart gun with rubber suction darts that have a 'stupid' flag on them. You can shoot them at other cars. If you accumulate ten, cops will pull you over and give you a ticket for being an idiot.
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